Participation Trophies

Today's post was written by Alison Moore. Alison is a senior Mechanical Engineering major at the University of Notre Dame. She is also a student in the Social Foundations of Coaching course taught by Play Like a Champion founder and director Professor Clark Power and Program Director Kristin Sheehan.  

I have been a fan of the Pittsburgh Steelers practically since birth. My dad grew up as a huge Pittsburgh fan and passed it on to our whole family, so I have been dressed in black and gold and waving Terrible Towels for as long as I can remember. My childhood was comprised of family road trips to go to Steelers training camp and attend games as a family, so despite the fact that I am away at school, where there is another important football team that consumes my life, I still do my best to follow the Steelers and my favorite players. 

Earlier this fall when a news story came out concerning one of my favorite players I was really intrigued: JamesHarrison, a linebacker for the Steelers, received considerable media attention after making a statement on Instagram about taking away his two young sons participation trophies:

"I came home to find out that my boys received two trophies for nothing, participation trophies! While I am very proud of my boys for everything they do and will encourage them till the day I die, these trophies will be given back until they EARN a real trophy. I'm sorry I'm not sorry for believing that everything in life should be earned and I'm not about to raise two boys to be men by making them believe that they are entitled to something just because they tried their best...cause sometimes your best is not enough, and that should drive you to want to do better...not cry and whine until somebody gives you something to shut u up and keep you happy. #harrisonfamilyvalues"

Harrison received several comments in response to this post, both positive and negative. Some people lashed out, and said that he was an awful parent for taking away the trophies his kids worked for, and that it should not matter whether or not they were first place trophies: Harrison should have been proud of them and accepted what they got. They criticized that it was an example of parents putting too much pressure on their kids on be perfect and that their best is never really enough. While I can understand how some people could interpret it that way, I am one of those who supported and agreed with what he did. 

In his comments, he reiterates how proud he is of his kids and that he will always be there to support them, and I think it is awful that anyone would accuse a parent of not supporting their children. I believe that his actions were justified, and that too often nowadays kids are being raised to think that they are entitled to a treat or a prize for everything they do, regardless of the effort they put in and the quality of the work they do. Personally, I was raised to always try to give 110% in everything I did (that was a frequent comment that my dad would make to me) and I know that having that philosophy instilled in me has made me the person I am today. 

This situation relates directly to a lot of conversations we had in the Social Foundations of Coaching class this semester. You want to show young kids that they are valued and that they can accomplish anything when they set their minds to it, without making them think that they can just get by without putting in serious effort. Coaches and parents often put a considerable amount of pressure on kids to perform a certain way, and while it may be a fine line to walk, I think that encouraging kids to do the absolute best they can do and rewarding them only when they truly earn something will benefit the child more in the long run. The values which we hope kids will learn from sports about integrity and hard work aren't going to be as meaningful if they think they will get a trophy just for showing up. 

It is pretty bold of Harrison to go so far as to take the participation trophies away from his children, and then post about it, but it really makes one wonder if this is what it is going to take to make people realize that you aren't always going to be a winner in everything you do.  

The Impact of Coaching on Parent-Child Relationships

Today's blog was written by Ryan Baer.  Ryan is a Junior Business Major and a student in the Social Foundations of Coaching course taught by Play Like a Champion Founder and Director Professor Clark Power and Program Director Kristin Sheehan.  

While I was not an amazingly gifted athlete in high school or college, I was fortunate enough to enjoy some athletic success as a child.  While this was inherently rewarding, one thing that made it uniquely special was the fact that my father frequently coached the basketball teams I played on growing up.  My involvement in multiple basketball teams enabled me to compare and contrast how my relationship with my father affected me, and I believe that this relationship is one that ought to be analyzed in great detail, given the large degree of involvement parents have in coaching youth sports.

While many parents who become involved with youth coaching do not have much experience studying coaching itself, my father was very involved in an organization which is similar to Play Like a Champion, called the Positive Coaching Alliance, which attempts to emphasize the significance of positive reinforcement in youth sports.  It was a very rewarding experience to receive words of encouragement from my father in an athletic setting, and I believe my teammates also appreciated his approach to coaching as well.  While the team he coached was not particularly competitive, I occasionally felt that he tried to make me work harder than some of the other players, in an attempt to demonstrate that my playing time was unrelated to our relationship.  Some times were particularly trying, but I believe having this relationship in an athletic setting granted me a greater perspective on the difficulties of parenting, an issue which can be difficult to grasp for a child.  I realized that he had my best interests at heart, and that understanding transmitted to other aspects of parenting as well; I was able to realize than in all aspects of parenting, both my father and mother were looking out for my best interests, even if I disagreed with (or tested) their methods on occasion.

Achieving success on this team enriched the relationship I had with my father, as it was something we could work for and aspire to together.  I think this is particularly unique and rewarding for a child, as most parenting decisions tend to be more unilateral than collaborative.  The benefit of this relationship became clearer to me in comparison to other teams I was involved in, where my dad was not involved in coaching.  While I certainly enjoyed the success I was able to achieve on these teams, I noticed that I derived less pleasure from these results, because a person I loved and cared about was less directly involved.  There certainly are risks in having exclusively parent coaches, as they may be less experienced in the nuances of successful coaching; however, having a parent who was an experienced coach proved to be an extremely rewarding experience for me.  I believe that more parent coaches should become involved in organizations such as Play Like a Champion or PCA, to ensure that this delicate relationship is able to be managed effectively.  Part of that responsibility falls on the parent themselves, to become actively involved in such groups, but that's why I'm glad Play Like a Champion is now reaching parents and coaches in over 35 states and several countries in their effort to reach out to parents on a more local level as well, providing informal and easy-to-attend workshops to encourage participation and improve the culture of youth sports.  While the parent-coach relationship is one that must be managed carefully, my own experiences have suggested that there can be a unique and great deal of benefit for both parties in the proper environment.

Coach Your Kids!

Steve Treacy is a sophomore Science-Business major at the University of Notre Dame.  Steve is a student in the Social Foundations of Coaching class taught by Play Like a Champion Founder and Director Clark Power and Program Director Kristin Sheehan, and is a photographer for the Notre Dame Athletic Department.  

As I went outside this morning, the sun was shining, the birds were chirping, and there was a cool breeze of air blowing across my face. My body was filled with joy and excitement, as this feeling brought me back to the days of playing baseball with my father as my coach.

From the age of four up to age of eighteen, I played baseball on my dad’s team in my town’s recreational league. Through those 14 seasons, my dad helped me evolve from a little kid who ran the wrong direction around the diamond after hitting the ball off the tee into an athlete who was hitting home runs and stealing bases. As I grew as a player, the relationship between my father and I grew stronger as we spent countless hours together out on the diamond. The stories of the memories that we created through baseball could fill the pages of a million blogs; however, there is one story in particular that I would like to share.

The author and his father at home plate.
Photo courtesy of the Treacy Family

In my junior year of high school, I decided that I wanted to try out for the high school varsity team. After playing in the recreational league for so long, I wanted to get the chance to prove that I belonged on the same field as the top players in my town as we competed against the top baseball players throughout the state. I trained all winter long--hitting in the cages daily, going to all the extra practices and workouts, and I even practiced staying in my catcher’s stance while I watched TV in order to continue improving my strength and my form. When tryouts came, I was in the best baseball shape of my life, and put everything I had into making the team. However, I was cut on the last day of tryouts, and told to “try again next year.” Needless to say, I was pretty bummed out. 

A few days later, I was in the cafeteria eating lunch with my buddies Ty and Jack, both of whom were on the varsity team. They were talking about their upcoming opening-day game. I told them that I wished that I could have been out there with them, playing for the varsity team. Jack looked back at me and replied that he was jealous of my position because I got to play baseball with my Dad as a coach. He said that his dad never had the time to coach a team, even when he was little. He had always wished that he could have gotten the chance to play with his dad.

I realized that what Jack said to me was 100% true. While maybe I had not gotten to play for varsity, getting cut meant that I got to play another season with my dad by my side. I realized how lucky I was to get a chance to go out there and spend hour after hour with the man who I look up to the most in this world. The next year, when my senior season rolled around and my dad asked if I was going to try out again, I responded “Why would I do that? That would mean 12 less games with you!” Looking back on it, being cut and getting the chance to keep playing with my dad was one of the greatest silver linings in my life.

In summation, this is my message to all parents reading this blog: Please, if you have the opportunity to coach your child, do not hesitate to take that opportunity. I know it sounds cheesy, but playing baseball with my dad was a part of my life that I will never forget, and I hope it will be the same for my future children. I would give anything to get the chance to go back and play another game with my dad coaching me from the dugout. By coaching your child, not only will you get a chance to share with them your love of the game, but it will also provide you and your child with fantastic lifelong memories, and will elevate the loving parent-child bond to a whole new level. 

Parental Support Is Key

Today's blog post was written by Anthony Rabasa.  Anthony is a senior Film, Television, Theater major at the University of Notre Dame, and is a student in the Social Foundations of Coaching course taught by Play Like a Champion founder Professor Clark Power and Program Director Kristin Sheehan.  Anthony is also a defensive lineman on the University's football team. 

It is very easy in today’s sports world to get caught up with winning and reaching goals. I believe that it is important for parents and coaches to know that when a young athlete is competing, the most important thing to them is that they just have fun. Thinking back to my own experience, I remember when I first began playing football. I would look forward to Saturday mornings because I knew it was game day and at the time, playing football was--and continues to be--one of the more fun experiences I have ever had.

When parents get too involved in a young athlete's development on the playing field, I believe it takes a personal toll on the athlete. Parents must let the coaches and athletes work together to improve in certain areas where the athlete needs improvement. My parents never really got involved with my coaches when I was a growing youth athlete, but they were always there to support me in my role. Naturally you want your child to be a superstar and have them always excelling on the playing fields. However, this is not always the case.  Even if the young athlete is not the play-maker or the superstar, he or she is still a valuable contributor to the team simply because they’re on the team. Telling a young athlete that he or she is doing well on the playing field will encourage them to do better.  I have found that this is especially true if the parent continues to tell their children that they are getting better every single day.  Speaking from experience, this really does go a long way.

Photo Credit: Columbus High School Football Team, Miami, FL

 If you were to take a close look into high school football playoffs, which are just wrapping up across the country, you can see a lot of examples of a parental relationships with athletes. My high school, which this year's state runner-up. Many things came to my mind when I began to think about my high school program. I happened to stumble upon an article on my high school home page, and it talked about how parents, and the crowd in general, at the semi-final game were outstanding. My alma mater was down 13 points at halftime, but the crowd remained calm and did not let a second go by without motivating my old team. I believe this is a great example of parents and a community coming together to motivate a team that has come so far and has made the community around them believe that they can win any game. That right there is a key component to winning, and that’s exactly what my team did.